i want my two dollars
Published Thursday, August 18, 2005 by tony the pony | E-mail this post
horatio told me he is learning to play the skin flute and the meat whistle...ive never heard of them but he goes out every night to practice and usually doesn't come back til morning. i would say this is troublesome but at this point there is not a whole lot i can do. we all know he hates black people, and jews, and the poor, and our military and now the iraqis.
as he was putting vaseline on his tongue he was complaining about how the iraqis have taken all of his money. he claims its his to earn however he sees fit and (ill quote) "those dirty brown people dont deserve any money that i could be making by playing the butt tuba". i was shocked...i was aghast...i dont know what a butt tuba is. i tried to explain the us was merely holding onto the money until such time iraq was in a position to better disseminate the money. iraq's infrastructure is not secure enough to receive such large wire transactions and unlike here in the united god fearing states of george w. bush people in iraq don't accept checks, american express, or a tune from the skin sax for payment. a check means nothing to them, a bank means even less, being loved and appreciated and being saved from being anally raped by sodom whosane's boys (spanky and john kerry) is what these people understand. of course some of the money is not being spent correctly...there's billions of dollars, the sheer odds are some of the money will be mis-spent. but i guess paying government workers and contractors to rebuild a country left poor from a dictatorship and in the throes of moving into a freer society, socially, spiritually, economically is worthless; afterall haliburton did get some money and one of their subsidiaries did get investigated...but damn those americans that want to help and to get paid for it. damn them. horatio feels the money is the spoils of war because "those damn colored people shouldnt have it...we won fair and square". his logic is simple, the money was in our bank so it must be ours...which is right because later today the fed is announcing all monies in all banks will now become the property of those banks. its being touted as "the horatio rule". iraq doesn't have a fed or a national marxist bank so tracking money, real or digital, is next to impossible. but it was clear i had confused horatio with logic again because he was taking penicillin.
on a seperate note it has turned up terrorists are not blowing themselves up as a result of jihad but to show support for horatio and the anti-war movement. here at 13sides we encourage them to continue and can only hope horatio will train them.